Addiction Proof?

There are a few differences between primary and secondary psychopaths. While I won’t pretend to know about sociopathy from a lived experience. I can share the experiences that I had with my sociopathic friends and the differences I noticed.

One big difference I saw and get asked about often is addiction potential.

At eleven I started stealing cigarettes from my neighbor and stashing them in the stone wall behind my house. I shared them with my friends, I was confused by their seemingly instant addiction to them. They went from wanting them to needing them. I also discovered they’d be willing to do things to get them!

By twelve I’d begun raiding people’s liquor cabinets. I remember my best friend at the time found alcohol to be irresistible. Together we began experimenting with every drug we could find. Even in a small town we were able to source weed, coke, pills, LSD, heroine, he loved it all and quickly fell into addiction. But I remained rather nonchalant, I thought it was fun, but I didn’t understand his endless hunger for them.

I watched him wither and rot away, his life completely undone by something that didn’t touch me. But why was I different? Was I just stronger? Was something wrong with me? …honestly I didn’t even care.

All I knew was I was able to enjoy anything I wanted when I wanted without consequence. I pushed the limits of my body.

At 15 I started losing friends to overdoses, incarceration, rehab and I went on like they’d never existed, just souls lost to the void.

I have discovered later in life that while I’ll never experience psychological addiction, I am still bound by the laws of physical dependency.

I have gained a deep respect for those who fight the battle of addiction and claw themselves free 🖤